Worldlog Week 07 - 2010 - Hoofdinhoud

It has been an exciting week. After the coalition parties frenetically closed ranks on the issue of Dutch support for the war in Iraq, we heard from the Dutch Labour Party (PvdA) on Wednesday that it did not want to bend once more to the Christian Democrats’ (CDA) will.

The CDA wanted to extend the Dutch military mission in Afghanistan, despite their promises they wouldn’t. We all know that especially the United States attaches great importance to a continued Dutch presence, so much so in fact, that the American ambassador Laurette Onkelinx affirmed that she would be made ‘the most powerful person on earth after Barack Obama’ if she were to decide to send Belgian troops to Afghanistan.

Ms Onkelinx politely turned down this fantastic offer, but it does tell us a great deal about the way in which the United States puts its allies under pressure.

Parliamentary debate on the situation resulted in nothing more than massive confusion, but when it comes down to it, this cabinet has done all it can and is tired of reacting.

On Friday we heard the word that the cabinet collapsed over the issue of Afghanistan and we are likely to hold new national elections in June. The polls indicate the Party for the Animals has a good chance of winning more seats in parliament than it already has.

In the run-up to the city council elections, for which we have excellent prospects in the city councils we are participating in, I read a wonderful observation written by a critical columnist in De Pers, a national daily paper in the Netherlands. A quote follows:

Before I talk about a turkey's sex life, I have to admit that I filled out Stemwijzer (An online questionnaire to help voters decide which party to vote for) and came out at The Party for the Animals.

There were a number of subjects that evoked ‘a certain feeling’ inside me. Then the animal issue arose. I’m not sure what the origins are, but these past few years I have gone from an insouciant meat eater to a foodie that draws back in disgust from the meat department at the supermarket.

The only reason I have left Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran unread for now is that I still want to be able to eat a rack of lamb every now and again.

The meat industry grows turkeys to such proportions that they can no longer even support their own weight, yet alone be able to reproduce. In order to keep production rolling, workers must regularly masturbate the animals.

The CDA is against sex with animals but ensured that this kind of treatment is not included in the legal ban, only acts with a moral connotation, otherwise it would have meant their voters could never touch another turkey again.

In order to understand why artificial inseminators are against masturbating animals, you probably need to be a member of the CDA, or simply put, a wanker.

Perhaps I should start looking deeper into the election issues over the coming weeks and then fill out the Stemwijzer once more. However, if I lack the courage to do so, and I don't rule it out, on 3 March I will enter the voting booth and just imagine the face of someone who supports the CDA working away on a fat turkey, and then simply vote for the Party for the Animals.

See you next week!